credit; some e-cards

Are you on social media sites?  How has being involved in social media effected your divorce?  There was no social media when I was first separated.  When I joined face book it was to stay in touch with long distance friends and extended family.  I had been separated about three years by this time.  But this has changed and like most people, I use it more for general socializing with friends and share more information than before.  My ex-husband is not a social media user as far as I know.  Consequently, it hasn’t had any bearing on my divorce but I’m curious about people who are beginning the divorce process now since social media has mushroomed in the last five years.

With all the online socializing, we compromise our privacy.  Lack of privacy can be destructive during a divorce. If you are an avid social media user how do you avoid ‘hot water’ when it comes to your divorce?  How do you resist a status update that looks like “He can go f**k himself!” or tweet about the latest thing your ex did to piss you off?    I have a friend who ranted a face book update about her ex only to find out later some of his family members read it. It changed everything, it was that bad. I’ve heard lawyers are using face book and twitter feeds for evidence in divorce trials.   There is rarely a more emotional time then during divorce but think twice before posting vicious statements.  Save those for your journal.  You’ll be preventing a family furor and protecting your children.  And that’s another can of worms. If you’re friends with your children on face book then you really have to be vigilant and keep the divorce off the site.

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Some e-cards

5 tips to protect yourself on social media while going through a divorce (adapted from BeforeIt’sNews.com)

1. Do not update your status with the locator-keep your privacy on a day to day basis especially if your divorce is contentious and personally threatening

2. Un-friend his friends on face book-he will be less likely to view pictures or updates of you

3. Even innocent updates can come back to haunt you in a divorce trial-He says you have a drinking problem and suddenly his lawyer has pictures of you partying with your friends (an innocent night out with the girls becomes evidence against you, sadly.)

4. Avoid obvious ripping of your ex on face book or twitter-if they are not true statements you can be sued for libel (even if they are true and he can prove damage to his reputation, you may be in trouble)

5. If in doubt, CLOSE your social media accounts for the duration of the divorce

source unknown

Just to fun let’s look at some difinitions (from Wikipedia);

Defamation—also called calumny, vilification, traducement, slander (for transitory statements), and libel (for written, broadcast, or otherwise published words)—is the communication of a statement that makes a claim, expressly stated or implied to be factual, that may give an individual,business, product, group, government, religion or nation a negative or inferior image. This can be also any disparaging statement made by one person about another, which is communicated or published, whether true or false, depending on legal state. In common law it is usually a requirement that this claim be false and that the publication is communicated to someone other than the person defamed (the claimant).^[1]Slander-“

 “Libel and slander both require publication.^[9] The fundamental distinction between libel and slander lies solely in the form in which the defamatory matter is published. If the offending material is published in some fleeting form, as by spoken words or sounds, sign language, gestures and the like, then this is slander.”  “Libel is defined as defamation by written or printed words, pictures, or in any form other than by spoken words or gestures.^[10] “-Wikipedia

some e-cards, Pinterest

That said, here I am blogging! But that’s a subject for another post…

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