photo credit someecards.com
People will ask you the weirdest, nosiest most obnoxious questions when you tell them your marriage is over. As a woman who made the decision to end my marriage, the reaction of bewilderment by some people was beyond frustrating. Here are the top dumbest divorce questions I got asked;
1. Did he have an affair? Yes, right and I’m going to share something so humiliating
2. Did you have an affair? Yup, let me tell you all the sordid details but you have to promise to tell no one!
Barbie came home too early photography: Dina Goldstein
3. You weren’t happy? No, I was over the moon with happiness that’s one of the reasons I walked away, duh!
4. Are you bipolar? I haven’t been officially diagnosed yet but if leaving my husband is akin to being unbalanced, then I guess I am
5. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Not here! and even if I had dreams for my life what gives you the right to question them?
6. Is there an event you can tell me about that can help me understand your decision better? Yes, the time when (fill in the blank with something shocking) and I was horrified! Does that event meet your divorce barometer?
It is unfair to expect someone to share such personal details of their marriage. Before asking a question ask yourself, would I want to answer this about my own marriage? If the answer is no, then the question shouldn’t be asked.This is all we need to know;
photo credit leavestrong.com
If you know someone going through, or initiating a divorce refrain from asking dumb divorce questions. Instead offer unconditional support, without judgment. Simply being there and listening are all that’s required to be a source of support to friend, sibling, son or daughter. If you are on the receiving end of obnoxious questions, just nod and smile and know that these people are trying to understand you and are grappling with their own problems and decisions. Hold your head high and be proud of your decision and remind yourself…
photo credit Alexis Chong
This can be your little secret;
photo credit postsecret.co
What was the dumbest divorce question someone asked you
p.s I should mention the questions were actually asked of me however, the outrageous answers I give have no factual basis.
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Margie
August 5, 2013 at 1:54 pmHi. I am initiating my divorce. The worst question I got was “maybe you are just depressed, because you look ok”. Then another one was not a question but an advice which is “Maybe you need to take a vacation then it will be fine when you come back”.
lisa
August 5, 2013 at 2:38 pmHi Margie, Isn’t that annoying? It’s condescending although I’m sure they think they’re being helpful…all the best to you.
Wendi
October 17, 2012 at 12:30 amIt’s not a question, but the comment that made me crazy was, “Well at least you are going to get what you want.”
I left my marriage, but divorce is not what anyone hopes for. I think everyone wishes their marriage was happy and their family had stayed together. Divorce is the only option i was left with, it is not what I wanted.
lisa
October 17, 2012 at 12:47 amI feel for you Wendi. It’s not a question of what you want but what you have to do. I agree with you, no one wants to go through divorce. Good for you for getting out when you had to and moving your life in the direction you needed to take it. Thanks for stopping by.
Cara Lopez Lee
September 18, 2012 at 9:43 pmI’m not divorced, but if someone asked me “Are you bipolar?” when we weren’t on that subject, I’d probably reply, “No, why – are you?” What a weird question. I’m going to be pondering that one the rest of the night. Funny they didn’t ask, “Is HE bipolar?” Anyway, you go girl!
lisa
September 18, 2012 at 10:00 pmI know it! What a crazy thing to say to someone. Trust me, I heard it all. That particular statement got started as a rumour. That was around the time I came up with “I’m not losing my mind, I’m finding it!” Thanks for stopping by Cara 🙂