Guys, as you know, I give advice here at the site and sometimes I even publish the Q & A as ‘Dear Lisa’. Is my advice always good? I hope so! However, I get all kinds of people writing me with questions and dare I say PROBLEMS.

So, this woman contacted me a month or so ago. I read through her long email. I gave it considerable thought before responding, of course.

Here’s the thing: Her question haunts me.

image source from unsplash by Didier Weemaels

Ideally, we would hire the best lawyer in town to handle our divorce proceedings. That’s not reality, however. The fact of the matter is very few of us can afford a top lawyer, and even many more can barely afford a bottom of the heap lawyer (not that we would recognize that until we’re half way through).

The sad truth about our divorce law is, it isn’t keeping up with the digital age and does nothing to rectify an economic divide when it comes to legal services.

“I have been a divorce lawyer for 20 years and the last time Canada’s Divorce Act was changed was in 1986, pre-dating the internet. In other words, Family Law in Canada operates as if the internet didn’t happen.”-Andrew Feldstein

That may be slowly changing though I’ll expand on that in a moment.

The question becomes should we spend our children’s education fund or our very last penny in our savings account on a lawyer? What choice do we have and how can we mitigate our financial losses during divorce.

One of the most challenging experiences for me during my divorce, was simply dealing with lawyers, attending meetings, discoveries, examinations and finally trial.

It can be intimidating to say the least. It’s one thing to sit with your own lawyer in their office but very different to sit across from your ex and his lawyer in a conference room. Add a court reporter, recording devices, piles of documents and know that you’re going to be grilled by a lawyer any moment, and you start to sweat.

source; Dreamstime

I’m very pleased to introduce to you Brad Micklin of The Micklin Law Group out of New Jersey, N.Y.  Brad generously agreed to answer my interview questions and you, dear readers will benefit from his family law wisdom.

If you’re in the middle of your divorce you probably feel like you’re chasing paper. You may have legal papers and bills spread out on your living room table.  You have important letters from your lawyer mixed up in your mail.  You haven’t opened the last envelope from your lawyer because you’re worried it’s a huge bill. These lawyers fees add up pretty quickly, while nothing seems to be getting done at all.  Sound familiar?

There are many false beliefs and stereotypes surrounding divorce.  Let’s separate fact from fiction or at least get a handle on some interesting divorce stats.  Take the quiz and find out if you are divorce savvy.

“Justice is open to everyone in the same way as the Ritz Hotel”-Judge Sturgess

image; dreamstime

Caveat: This post is intended to empower you.  It is not legal advice.

It sounds crazy but some people find themselves in the Appellate Courts for their divorce.  Picture this; two people cannot agree on their divorce settlement  so they proceed to trial.  A judge decides for them how their assets will be divided and how much alimony if any will be awarded and where the kids will be and when.  But that’s not the end…

Inevitably, someone doesn’t ‘like’ the judgment.  Usually it’s the person who pays the support or deems he got less in the decision.  If he or she has the resources they take the judgment to Appeals in an attempt to change the decision….  Do they need grounds for the

source; Dreamstime

Sometimes in life we simply haven’t got the resources for professional advice.  Sometimes we have to go it alone.  It can be scary but necessary.  Self representing in divorce really should be a last resort though.  Why?  Because Divorce can be a little like a wild river rafting ride and you wouldn’t navigate that alone.

Picture this: The water starts out flat… You have your paddle to contribute to the direction of the raft.  You have a leader who is a pro paddler keeping the raft on

Are you ready for some Legal Speak?  One of the hardest lessons during divorce besides the emotional ones, are the legal ones.  If you’ve never had to hire a lawyer or deal with any legal issues it can be an eye opener.  I was a real newbie in the legal arena.  I had no clue the costs involved, the time involved nor any handle on the legal vocabulary.  Initially, finding