This writing prompt from Writer’s Digest asks “Write a story or scene that includes “sound words” that set the scene. What is going on? What do the characters hear, or what sound waves do they feel?”
The objective of the prompt is an exercise to get the writer using onomatopoeia (sound words). I haven’t heard that word since grade school 🙂 This writing prompt motivated me and I know it’s something I should challenge myself to more often for practice.
Here is my response and it had to be under 500 words which mine was by a smidge. Enjoy and feel free to write your own and link back in the comments.
It was going to be hard to tell her. Lydia sat across from her mother at the old, pinewood kitchen table that wobbled and creaked under her elbows. The coffee maker percolated while Lydia avoided her mother’s eyes.
“Ma, the table is really on its last legs, literally,” Lydia chuckled at her own pun.
“Hon, you know I can’t get rid of it. It’s been a part of this family for…well, forever, actually,” Eva sighed and brushed her hand lovingly across the table’s dented surface. Lydia couldn’t help but notice Eva’s fleshy upper arm jiggling inside her kimono sleeve.
Lydia remembered her mother bought that kimono at a flea market when Lydia was only ten years old. She hated being dragged to the flea markets every summer. The only good thing was the food. The cotton candy, popcorn and soft drinks always tempted Lydia. She could not only smell it now, years later, but she could hear the sound of the crowds and merchants bartering with prospective buyers.
“Ma, remember when you bought that kimono?” Lydia was keenly aware she was procrastinating what she truly came here to discuss with Eva.
“Uh,” —Eva looked down at her belly, touching the krinkling fabric as if to jog her memory— “tell the truth, I don’t.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Lydia said.
The kitchen grew silent now that the coffee maker had finished gurgling and moaning. Lydia took that as a cue to lift herself off the creaking chair and get them each a much needed cup of joe. As she filled the mugs, the coffee splashed a bit on the countertop. Lydia was deep in thought and not entirely paying attention. She placed one mug in front of her mother and one in her place at the table.
“Want the cream and sugar, Ma?”
“Yes, please, hon.”
Lydia opened the refrigerator, grabbed the cream and left the door open only to have it beep to alert her to her wasting energy.
Sitting across from her mother now, Lydia took a deep breath in. Their spoons tinkled against the ‘cat’ mugs. Instead of talking, Lydia exhaled and poured more cream into her coffee. Taking a gulp and closing her eyes at the pure satisfaction of the caffeine, she paused in thought. Just then her cell phone rang to the tune of church bells. Lydia glanced down at her phone on the table and saw Sissy’s phone number and thumbnail photo of her holding Johnathan when he was a baby.
“Who’s that calling you so early?”
“No one important. I’ll call them back.”
“How’s Robert doing, by the way?”
“Well, that’s something I want to talk to you about, Ma.”
“Well, start talking. I’m all ears.”
“I’m leaving him.”
The clock hanging in the kitchen ticked as if waiting for an explanation. The fridge hummed conspiratorially. Her cell phone vibrated, and the chair squeaked as Lydia leaned back waiting for a response from her Catholic mother.
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Suzanne @ The Bookish Libra
August 15, 2019 at 7:03 pmThis is fantastic. I love all of the details and of course the mother/daughter relationship.
lisa
August 16, 2019 at 7:43 amThank you so much Suzanne. Glad you enjoyed the details. 🙂
Marcia @ Menopausalmom.com
August 14, 2019 at 1:12 pmVery good and intriguing!
lisa
August 16, 2019 at 7:43 amThank you Marcia 🙂 !
Christine Carter
August 10, 2019 at 9:00 amLisa, you are SUCH a gifted storyteller. Seriously. This was incredible. I could literally hear all the sounds you so beautifully described… I could picture the table and feel it’s grainy surface and wobbling legs and hear the coffee percolating and the fridge beep and the phone’s church bells ring- within all the sounds, the silence was most powerful. Soooo good, my friend. I want you to write the rest of this one!
lisa
August 10, 2019 at 6:55 pmAw, thank you so much, Chris. It was fun writing sound words haha. I like Lydia, I do wonder where she’s going and who Sissy is to her…
Vrujal Bhalani
August 10, 2019 at 5:42 amGreat Story 🙂
lisa
August 12, 2019 at 11:24 amThank you 🙂
Balroop Singh
August 8, 2019 at 5:33 pmI could hear all those sounds Lisa…though we hear them everyday but you have added a new meaning to them! I know your skill of story telling is unique. Looking forward to more. 🙂
lisa
August 8, 2019 at 7:06 pmI’m happy to hear the sounds came through in the scene 🙂 Thank you, Balroop!
DGKaye
August 8, 2019 at 1:58 pmWow, well done Lis! Great prompt for sure! And fyi, I still don’t get any replies to my comments here on your blog 🙁
lisa
August 8, 2019 at 6:57 pmThank you, Deb! It was a fun one to write. Do you mean you don’t get email notice when there is a reply?
I used to have a plug in that would add that feature to the comment box, BUT that plug-in was not updated for years and so I had to remove it since it was showing as a risk. So, I’m not sure how to get that feature back. WordPress sites tend to have this feature built in so I’ll look into it again 😛
Tamara
August 8, 2019 at 9:30 amLove this and can’t wait to see what happens, if something happens! I hope you do finish it, but it’s strong enough on its own.
lisa
August 8, 2019 at 6:52 pm<3 Thank you, Tamara! We'll see. I have so many characters waiting for their stories to finish---now I must add Lydia to the list haha.
Eli@CoachDaddy
August 8, 2019 at 9:22 amGah, the detail. I felt like I was waiting for a cup too. To see the next passage …
lisa
August 8, 2019 at 6:51 pmHaha! I tend toward detail in my writing… 😛 Thanks, Eli. Good to know you would stay for another cup just to see what was going to happen.
Chrys Fey
August 8, 2019 at 8:24 amWonderful story/prompt! I agree that you should finish it.
And i sure remember when “onomatopoeia” was my favorite long word in grade school. lol
lisa
August 8, 2019 at 6:50 pmThank you, Chrys 🙂 Right? What a funny word and I think every kid giggled just a bit when the teacher said it.
Vishnu
August 7, 2019 at 12:06 pmWow – powerful – when is the rest of the story being written Lisa? 🙂 The anticipation and build up is effective!
lisa
August 7, 2019 at 8:27 pmThankyou, Vishnu 🙂 No idea what this story is, just played with it…haha, maybe I should finish this.