Happy Sunday, Escapees. Today I’m over at Vishnu’s blog answering some burning divorce questions. I think you will find this an interesting interview and one worth sharing with loved ones who may be thinking about divorce right now. Here’s a snippet;
What led you to leave your marriage?
Well, I guess you won’t be surprised when I say it was multiple things rather than one event. It was many small and big things over many years that ultimately led to the demise of my marriage. I finally accepted my unhappiness at the core of my being and gave myself permission to accept that life wasn’t turning out the way I expected. I faced the fact that it had to change. I realized too that ending a marriage, knowing what we need in our life to live authentically, is a very personal matter.
What factors should women consider before leaving a marriage?
There are many and here I will list in order of importance;
Children-your children will always be your #1 concern so, ensuring they understand what’s happening, that they are comfortable and well cared for is priority. Keep the communication open and ongoing, too. Often couples forget to talk about things after the big announcement. That is wrong—keep the conversation going and be as honest as possible while reminding them that their only job is to ‘be a kid’….
I encourage you to click over to Vishnu’s site for a read of the full interview. In addition, if you haven’t had a visit to Vishnu’s site, you’re in for a treat. He’s all about treating yourself with love and respect following a break up or divorce. I always find Vishnu’s posts and writings uplifting and just what we need to get through a tough, emotional time.
Thanks again to Vishnu for hosting me. Thanks, to you my dear readers for taking an interest and sharing.
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kimbacaffeinate
March 26, 2017 at 1:12 pmIt was a wonderful interview.
lisa
March 26, 2017 at 8:33 pmThanks, Kim. So sweet of you to check it out!
Christine Carter
March 24, 2017 at 9:27 amI’m anxious to read more of your perspective. Heading over now!
lisa
March 24, 2017 at 5:47 pmThanks Chris, for checking it out. Hope you find a nugget of wisdom in there somewhere…:D
Kimberly
March 23, 2017 at 12:00 pmI went over and read Lisa and it was a wonderful interview.
I think kids are more in tune than what we realize. We are going through something major over at the house of Chunky and (no Shawn and I are fine) when we go to meetings, Chunky is quite verbal and asks questions. At eight, I am surprised at how much he absorbs and how much his mind swirls with questions. So definitely kids need to be kept up to date with what is happening. Kids suffer anxiety just like adults to. We need to communicate with them as much as possible especially in life altering events like these.
lisa
March 23, 2017 at 6:18 pmHi Kim, you are soooo right about the kid-tuition thing. I didn’t mention that in the interview, did I? My mistake because it’s a real thing. They always know more than we give them credit for. Thanks so much for sharing your valuable perspective here! xo
Charlotte
March 22, 2017 at 12:34 pmOh, excited to follow you over there, Lisa! Always love the gems you share about relationships… I also agree about open communication. I understand that if kids are a certain age, they maybe shouldn’t be privy to all the key components, but it’s always a good idea to keep them in the loop. It’s always beneficial I think for them to know that mom/dad still love them and they’ll always be the #1. On my way over now, my sweet! XOXO
lisa
March 22, 2017 at 4:48 pmThanks, Charlotte for checking out the interview 🙂 Good point, that kids don’t need to know every detail (especially when they’re small). Plus, LOVE and security are things that shouldn’t be lost to them.
marie kléber
March 22, 2017 at 9:14 amWhat a lovely interview Lisa ! You are right leaving a mariage provide its load of hardships and joys. Kids should always remain our priority and they should always know that we LOVE them despite the mess around…
Just started reading your book. Will talk soon about it on the blog.
Take care.
lisa
March 22, 2017 at 11:21 amThank you, Marie! I’m glad you mentioned LOVE because that is the key to helping the kids through. I’m happy to hear you’re reading the book 🙂
Marcia @ Menopausal Mother
March 20, 2017 at 6:17 pmI totally agree that open communication with the children and between the soon-to-be divorced parents is critical.
lisa
March 22, 2017 at 8:46 amHi Marcia, yes that’s a ‘must’ but often the hardest part of all!
Jane Thrive
March 20, 2017 at 6:17 pmWhat a wonderful interview, Lisa! Thanks so much for sharing your wisdom and knowledge. So spot on and helpful. Love and hugs to you! <3 <3 <3
lisa
March 22, 2017 at 8:46 amThanks for stopping over and reading it, Jane. I hope it helps women thinking about divorce 🙂
Balroop Singh
March 19, 2017 at 8:47 pmVishnu has written so much about healing after divorce that he seems to be more of a therapist than a lawyer!!
Nice interview.
I liked your honest answers Lisa. Giving priority to children shows what a wonderful mother you must be.Your advice also is so good that leaving a marriage has to be a personal decision…nobody can understand the circumstances of a person who takes such a difficult decision.
lisa
March 20, 2017 at 4:45 pmThank you for checking it out Balroop. Yes, Vishnu’s work is inspiring! He’s a wonderful soul
Vishnu
March 22, 2017 at 8:24 amTHank you both for the kind words. So glad to have Lisa over and ask her the burning questions that many of my readers in that in between space (should I stay/should I go) are thinking about.